STUCK ON THE BEACH

Recently, my husband and I decided to go to the beach to watch the sunset. We picked up our dinner curbside and drove to Dunedin Causeway, a local spot with wonderful sunset views.

We enjoyed our shrimp dinners and the waves rippling against the shore. Pelicans diving for their dinner is one of my favorite things to watch, and it was perfect timing!

My husband, Paul, is a photographer, so he set up his tripod to take some photos of the sunset. As time for the sunset came and went, it was apparent we weren’t going to get to see one, as the clouds moved in and obscured the view. But we had enjoyed the experience anyway.

As I tried to start the car to leave, it made a strange sound. The lights on the dashboard lit up, but it wouldn’t start. It was dead. No problem, we thought. We have AAA! As a side note, this service has been very helpful to us, especially me, as I have locked my keys in my car a number of times over the years (stories for another time).

The AAA lady, who was clearly in a state other than Florida, came on the phone and politely asked for the address where we were. “The beach,” I responded. “On Dunedin Causeway.”

“Hmmmm,” she said. “I don’t see that on the map. What’s a cross street nearby?”

“There isn’t one. We’re at the beach.”

As she continued to pleasantly look for a cross-street, I said, “Whoever you send will be local, and they will know exactly where we are.” She didn’t sound convinced. I said, “Tell them we are on the beach by the restrooms.” I’m sure I was her most interesting call of the day, although a frustrating one.

A few minutes later, “Bill” called my cell phone. “We’re on the Dunedin Causeway by the restrooms,” I informed him. “Yeah! I know exactly where you are!” He arrived soon after, changed our battery, and we were on our way.

God always knows where you are.

As reassuring as it was for the AAA guy to know where we were, an amazing thing is that God always knows where we are! The creator and sustainer of the world will comfort and help you.

Psalm 139:3 says, “You discern my going out and my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways…”

UPS & DOWNS

I do not ride roller coasters.

In my teen years I rode them a few times, but I was never really a fan. Maybe it’s because I like to have my feet planted on the ground and control of my direction.

On a particularly sunny, pleasant day, a friend and I went to Disney. As we meandered around Animal Kingdom, we came upon “Expedition Everest,” a ride that goes into a mountain and comes out on the other side. I could see the riders on it, and it looked harmless — even like they enjoyed it.

Here’s the problem: there was no line. Fans of Disney and other theme parks will think that’s not a problem — it’s a great stroke of luck! I didn’t have time to think about my decision to be open-minded, as we literally strolled straight onto the “train” of this roller coaster. It was pleasant and fun as we slowly went up a hill, into the pitch black mountain. Suddenly, we were FALLING STRAIGHT BACK DOWN IN THE DARK! All I could think of was, “God, please help me survive this.” It seemed never-ending, as we fell into an abyss.

As we exited the train, I said, “Never again. Never again. You will never get me on one of those things again.” Of course my friend was laughing, partly because she enjoyed it so much, but mostly because I was traumatized. (What are friends for again?)

This short story is not about the ups and downs of life, although that would make sense, being about a roller coaster ride. It’s about the downs. The spiraling backwards in the dark when you don’t know if your situation will ever end. When we have dark experiences, we should remember that God is right there with us. He is our hope in the downs of life. (“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1-3)

Whether you are in a spiraling out-of-control job, relationship, diagnosis, or financial situation, He cares. He is with you if you ask him to be.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you.” (Isaiah 41:10)

WHO ARE YOU FOLLOWING?

I don’t normally have theological discussions in the Walmart parking lot. But on this particular occasion, I ran into (not literally) a friend, Margaret. We had known each other for a few years through our church, and she had recently graduated from seminary. Looking and listening for her first place of ministry was proving to be challenging. As we talked, a verse came to mind that had been very helpful to me when my husband was awaiting his first “call” to a church.

In our case, Paul was about to graduate from seminary after three years. It was springtime, and we had to move out of our duplex on the campus in a few weeks. We had no clue where we were going, and I was concerned. I was in a Bible Study Fellowship class, and around this time the teaching leader referred to II Corinthians 2:14.

“But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him.”

She vividly described Christ, dressed in purple (a sign of royalty), riding atop a white horse in an incredible procession. Picturing this and seeing myself following Jesus was very comforting to me. I knew that when the time was right, he would lead us to where he wanted us to serve.

As I described this to Margaret, I could see peace and relief come across her face. She knew he was leading her, and she felt our encounter was what he had used to reassure her. She went on to serve at a church in California, but we had connections that enabled us to see one another every now and then. Whenever I saw her, we always talked about our divine meeting.

Are you in Christ’s triumphal procession? He will lead you, too. Watch and listen for him! And remember he can use us anywhere, anytime.

Even in the Walmart parking lot.

BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT

When my husband was in seminary, we lived in Austin, Texas. I was a stay-at-home mom, and Paul was a full-time student with a nightly part-time job. At some point I realized I needed a break from handling two toddlers at once — all day every day, usually by myself. (That may sound lame, but it was true.) I researched local preschools and found one at a church nearby that sounded wonderful. So when he was three, Colin started preschool.

One day, after dropping him off at school, two year old Christopher and I went to the post office. There was a line, and I knew I was pressing my luck to expect him to be patient while we waited for our turn. He did well, though. When it was our turn, we walked to the very high counter. Christopher stood next to me while I conducted my postal business.

Suddenly, I felt someone bite my leg! (I knew who it was.) While looking straight at the postman, I sternly said, “Don’t. Bite. Me.” Apparently, he didn’t know I had a small child with me, and the look on his face, as they say, was priceless. I laughed and explained to him what had happened. I think he was glad when we left.

This humorous situation led me to think about experiences we may have that lead to false assumptions. I was glad for the opportunity to explain to the postman what had happened, but sometimes we don’t have the chance to do so. Regardless of our initial impression in situations, I have learned there is always another side to the story. Giving one another the benefit of the doubt can go a long way in relationships.

“So in everything, do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Matthew 7:11)

WHAT ABOUT LOVE?

I could smell it before I even got to the apartment. When I opened the door, the stench was overwhelming. Thank goodness I had on a mask. And gloves. The building had a water view, which was ironic, considering tourists pay a lot of money to see that view.

Inside I found an old man, dejected and ill. The garbage on the floor was knee deep. There were several kinds of insects either flying around me or crawling on the floor and garbage.

We had a nice conversation. He was depressed, obviously. His neighbor had cleaned up the apartment some the week before, but I couldn’t tell. I referred him to agencies that could help him, but there was a waiting list. There’s always a waiting list.

During my second visit, as I sat in a plastic chair talking to him, I suddenly felt a prompting. I stood up, asked where the trash bags were, and started cleaning up the garbage. Days old food, bugs, and trash went into big, black garbage bags. He watched. Then he said, “Why are you doing this?” I replied, “I want to help you.” He kept asking, “But why are you helping me?” “Because I care about you.” He was amazed.

As sad as it was, and as nasty as it was to clean up, I felt the Holy Spirit’s presence. It was love in action. I can’t take the credit because He told me to do it. I simply acted. Sometimes we talk, and other times we show His love.

How many of my “messes” has God cleaned up? He repeatedly forgives me through His grace and love. Showing His love to others isn’t always easy, as we all know, but we are to do it anyway.

“Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.” (I John 3:18)

Special Friend

I first met Tina at a Bible Study in the community where we lived. She was joyful, energetic, and her love of the Lord was evident. We didn’t have a lot of time to visit with one another during the study, and that was frustrating to me. I wanted to get to know her!

One evening Tina wasn’t at the study, and some devastating news was shared with the group. Her parents had been murdered. She had gone to the northern state where they had lived, to her childhood home, to be with her brothers and sister. Apparently, their house had been randomly targeted by a homeless man. It didn’t make sense, and it still doesn’t.

A few weeks later, she returned to the study. Eventually I got to know her, and we became good friends. As our friendship grew, she shared with me that the authorities had caught the man who had killed her parents, and he was in jail awaiting trial. I was fascinated when she told me she planned to write him a letter after the trial. She wanted to tell him she knew all he had done and because of God’s power in her and what Jesus had done for her, she was able to extend forgiveness to him.

But then he killed himself in prison. Though it would have been difficult to go through, there would be no trial, no opportunity to see him and perhaps obtain some closure to the horrendous thing he had done to her family. And the letter would not be written.

Through this tragedy, as well as other traumas in her life, God has given Tina a ministry to women who have experienced trauma. For over 10 years, she has led groups for women who have had traumatic experiences. Many women have been helped and supported while they dealt with their personal tragedies.

Her recently published book, Living in Freedom : A Biblical Road Map for Navigating Life’s Pain,* talks about her journey dealing with the death of her parents, and it also has stories of other women who have dealt with their own traumatic experiences. One statement written by a colleague of hers sums it up well: “Tina herself knows tragedy, but she also knows Jesus and the hope, healing, and freedom only He can provide.”

“In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and he answered by setting me free.” (Psalm 118:5 ERV)

By the way, Tina is still joyful, energetic, and her love of the Lord is evident.

*If you would like to read her book, it can be ordered at www.Westbowpress.com

CHRISTMAS LETTER LIFE

Every year I look forward to receiving Christmas letters from friends I haven’t seen in years. It’s fun to read about how their lives are going and what their kids are doing. But I haven’t always enjoyed them. In the past when I’ve read them, I found myself having negative feelings of sadness and jealousy when reading news of what seemed like a perfect life. High-achieving children with eyes on a future career that would propel them to success. Rosy neighborhoods with beautiful houses, meaningful extended family time, and multiple vacations to places that would make your eyes pop out! When our sons were growing up, I enjoyed sending a picture and letter to friends, too. I tried to make it informative but not too “rosy,” but I probably didn’t always succeed.

As I’ve grown older, I realize that pictures and letters don’t always tell the whole story. In this fallen world, we all have challenges. Christmas letters don’t tell us that Trey’s heart was broken by his “first love,” that Sally got pregnant last year and had an abortion, or that Jeremy got suspended from school for a week. I happen to know that their marriage is rocky, despite the smiling picture that accompanies the letter.

As I pray for God to lead me to what he wants me to do and who he wants me to help every day, I have to ask myself — would I be able to relate to and help people know the Lord better if my life seemed so perfect? If I bragged that my children were breezing through life with God at the bow of the boat, would people see that I need you? Could I relate to those whose children are slowly paddling across an ocean of waves, frequently getting blown off course, not necessarily of their own doing but in trying to figure out life?

If my life was like a Christmas letter, would I look down on Christian friends whose kids have become teen parents, addicted to something, been arrested, run away from home? Would they come to me for support if my life seemed perfect?

There is a passage in the Bible that talks about us comforting one another: “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-6)

One year we received a Christmas picture that was bent and torn, having gotten caught in a mail machine along the way. It occurred to me that this card was a more realistic picture of all of our lives. There are many good things that happen, but we all experience the “bent and torn” times when things aren’t going well.

I want to be more aware of those times so God can use me to comfort others as he has comforted me.

WE NEED TO CHRISTMAS SO HARD THIS YEAR!

I saw this sign in a store window last week. Hmmmm. I’ve never seen Christmas used as a verb, so that was something to think about. I know the gist of what they were getting at. It’s been a hard year, and we need to have a party! And come in here and buy stuff.

But can one really Christmas? Even though we typically have lots of parties and celebrations which may or may not be related to the true reason for the holiday, I don’t think this season is about that kind of party.

I picture “Christmasing” as looking up at the sky at night and wondering what the shepherds thought when they saw a choir of angels. And that they believed the message and went to Bethlehem to see the Savior the angels sang about. Then later, wise men — however many there were — following a star in the sky, knowing to whom it was leading them. And taking gifts all that way! Probably heavy gifts! Being told in a dream that evil King Herod was trying to find Jesus to kill him, and having the faith to believe the dream and go home another way.

And stinky animals in a sacred manger, sharing the space with the tiny King of the world. A teenaged mother being so amazed and grateful that she was chosen to take part in this moment. Joseph, having been so patient and having faith that God was in control.

Do you have the kind of faith exhibited in this story? It’s about having faith in things we can’t see. About trusting that God is still in control and will use us in his plans, as he used Mary, Joseph, the angels, shepherds, and wise men.

“And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David, a Savior has been born; he is the Messiah, the Lord.’ ”

(Luke 2:8-11)

Today I saw me

While walking through the mall today, I saw me. I didn’t immediately recognize myself, but after watching for a couple of minutes, I knew it was me. As she corralled her small children through the mall, the stressed face and forced smile, combined with a “we need to go so I can get some things done” look were a dead give-away. At her children’s insistence, she let them ride one of those animals that you put coins in and it goes up and down. They were having a blast! She wasn’t. She looked like –“Oh! I need to stop and do this real quick so they’ll remember a happy childhood.”

Next to her was a different kind of mom. A relaxed smile was on her face as she watched her children ride. Instead of stress, she exuded a look of, “I wish I could fit on this elephant with them so we could ride together!” No “to do” list was hanging out of her purse or at the forefront of her mind. She was in the moment, and she was not letting stress take over her life.

Even though my children are no longer riding the rocking elephant at the mall, there are always stressors and “to do” lists in my life. One thing the Bible teaches us, though, is we were not meant to be stressed. During this Christmas season, we can be tempted to become anxious about getting everything done — the gifts, the decorations, the cards.

Starting your day with a simple prayer can help you focus on being in the moment. “God help me today to focus on you so my priorities will be yours.”

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans.” Proverbs 16:3

do you need direction?

I should know better than to trust my GPS. In my job as a social worker, I visit patients in their homes, which means I drive a lot. One day as I was looking for a house, in the midst of twists and turns onto various streets, my GPS stopped talking. She was confused! That was when I realized I can’t always trust my GPS.

So I was already on guard about trusting it, when my “cigarette lighter” stopped working (shouldn’t we change the name of that?). I use it every day to charge my phone as well as my GPS. Since I didn’t want to spend money to get the cigarette lighter fixed, I decided to revert back to the “old days.” A map. (wow — did we really use those only a few years ago?) So my map and I set out to conquer the city. Except it wasn’t working very well. The tiny print and my “older” eyes didn’t mesh. I was getting a headache. And worse — mad. By the time I got to the first patient’s house, I was the one needing a social worker!

When I got home, I informed my husband that we were going to have to get my cigarette lighter fixed. At the prospect of shelling out cash, creativity took hold of him. He called a friend to ask for advice. Well what do you know? His friend said there should be another cigarette lighter in the trunk area of my van. It was there! (How would someone even find it if they wanted to light up?) What a blessing! My wonderful GPS was back! The only problem was that the cord wouldn’t reach to the front of the van. The GPS was relegated to the trunk.

“No problem,” I told my husband. “My friend is back, and that’s all I care about.”

So the next morning I went to the back of my van, lifted up the door to the trunk, and typed in the address where I was headed. But after a few blocks, I realized I could only hear it if I turned the radio OFF and listened very carefully. Focus. I had to have it, or I would never get where I was going.

Enter the Holy Spirit. Actually, he had been there the whole time, but I’m known to get distracted and forget that. The situation with my GPS reminded me of listening to the Holy Spirit. Or not. Noise, clutter in my mind, and changing scenery can mute his voice. I need to seek him to be able to go where he wants me to. That involves turning off distractions around me, focusing, and really listening for his still, small voice. Unlike my GPS, God will always lead me where I need to go.

“Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!” (I Chronicles 16:11)